These posts are a part of my #sharingmyheartwithyou series, where I do exactly that, sharing my heart with you. 🙂

“Don’t you ever apologize for claiming your space. You applied for the job, you were hired for the job, there’s a reason why you got the job and not someone else, so you’re not taking anyone else’s space, it’s rightfully your own. So own it, claim it, no one else can offer your perspective, past experiences, opinions, views or talents. They need YOU and everything that you have to offer. You’re meant to be right where you are.”

I was recently talking to a friend who felt the need to apologize for claiming someone else’s space. She felt she took a job that should have been given to someone else that could relate to the students better, someone with the same ethnicity as the majority of the students. So I found myself telling her the above, that while she can’t understand firsthand their experiences, nor can they. So she can share her perspective, struggles and listen to their stories and both parties can grow empathy and understanding from each other. That they’ll both come out more open minded and better because of it. Only you can offer what no one else in the world can offer. Each one of us are truly unique and special because of that.

Some people think hiding their talents is being humble. That they’re doing a good thing. But when you hide your talents, you’re doing a disservice to not just yourself but to everybody else. When you are fearless and bold in sharing your talents, you are only empowering and motivating others to pursue their own talents and passion.

No inspiring/motivational speaker starts their talk with, “I’m sorry I’m here today speaking in front of you instead of somebody else, I feel this is not my space… there’s someone more qualified…” Do you feel empowered listening to that? No. Think of the people who have empowered you to reach your best. To dream big. It’s the people who have OWNED their stage, owned their talents, and weren’t fearful of sharing their strengths.

God gave us our talents. When we share and proudly show it, we are only glorifying God that much more and sharing his goodness and power. We are not boasting! The talent wasn’t ours to begin with, it comes from God!

When we have that mindset when people share their achievements, talents and success, we wouldn’t be jealous. We’d genuinely be happy for them that God is working through them and be astonished at how wonderful and great God’s children are. How magnificent and vast his talents are. And what talent we must have within us that needs to be shared.

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#sharingmyheartwithyou
People have never changed out of fear, but only out of love. When we use fear on others and ourselves, it might change the actions or the behaviors temporarily but it never changes the hearts. God never uses fear, guilt trip or force to change us. Instead, he uses patience, long suffering, non-judgment and most of all, love. Unconditional love, no matter what we have done. He never withholds his love. It’s always us turning away from him, it’s never him. He doesn’t try to change us on his timeline, but waits for our timeline instead, when we are truly ready.

You’ve heard of the saying, “Exercise because you love your body, not because you hate it.” Same can be said for everything else. “Change because you love yourself, not because you hate yourself.”, “Pursue your dream because you believe in yourself, not from the fear of being a failure.”, “Work on overcoming your addiction because you have faith in yourself, not from self loathe or hate.”, “Change others for their own good, not because it fills up your ego, reputation or agenda.”

When we try to change others, it should be done out of love, never with fear. They’ll change their actions temporarily to please you, but their hearts, their characters stay the same. So how do we use love to truly change others? Stop trying to change them! Accept them for who they are NOW in the present moment. Love them. Don’t lecture, nag, threaten, guilt-trip, or give an ultimatum with your timeline. It’s when we stop trying to change them and love them like Christ would, that they truly start to change. According to their timeline. So be patient. And love. Love is ALWAYS the right answer. LOVE is always the higher-law of living. LOVE is never outdated or the wrong timing.

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We gained another son(my nephew) in our #TyauSunday, Jay’s too cool for school and our son is starting a new trend of fur boots + a suit.

I hope you’re having a relaxing Sunday!

#sharingmyheartwithyou: Act vs. react

If you were to ask me what my ultimate goal in life is, it is to get to the point of never reacting to a situation but acting instead. Jesus never reacted, he always acted. He always filled his own cup with only good things and when people bumped into his cup, he was able to spill kindness, patience and love. So my biggest goal in my life is to do just that. It is not to make a certain amount of money, to achieve certain status or reputation, it is something internal no one will be able to measure except God. The greatest accomplishments will always be intangible over tangible. If my goal of opening up schools in third world countries comes true, my biggest accomplishments won’t be the schools I opened up or the money I raised, it’ll be the hearts that changed and the love they felt because of it. I want to spill only love. I want to do everything out of love, never judgement, annoyance, offense or anger. I’ve realized that when I am offended, hurt, bugged, annoyed, frustrated, mad, or feel the need to tell someone their place, that’s a direct reflection of my weakness. When we are offended by someone, the offense comes from the insecurity we put in our own cup. They’ve only stirred it and bumped it, causing it to spill. But we can only spill what we put in our cup. Only we can choose what we put in our cup. So I shouldn’t blame someone else for bumping and spilling my cup, I need to take responsibility for what I put inside that cup and spills out of it and own up to my actions/reactions.

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