adi pushing rapunzel on the swing.
last friday when we woke up and had breakfast, we went to target, the grocery store, and then the playground just like i had promised the girls if they were good. when we got home, we ate lunch, then i did my daily routine for naptime which is giving adi and ana their milks, tucking adi in her bedroom, turn on the heater and the humidifier in her room, then turn on the ipad while she watches something for 5-10 mins. while i put ana to sleep. so i closed her door and then went into ana’s room, turned on her heater and humidifier, lied down with her while she drank her milk, then waited until she fell asleep so i could quietly sneak out of her room to go put adi to sleep and to take a nap myself with adi too. i do this every single day. and not once in the last 2+ years did i ever fall asleep while lying down with ana since i knew adi was waiting for me.
well, this day was different. i guess i had fallen asleep because i suddenly woke up and found myself lying next to ana. i quickly reached for my phone and it was an hr. later. i jumped out of the bed and snuck out of the room and when i entered the hallway, i saw adi’s room’s door wide open, her ipad shut off, her bedroom lights on, and her missing. i called out her name and then i saw down the end of the hallway that the door from the kitchen to the laundry and garage doors were open. i ran out and saw the door to the garage was open and the garage door was open. there was a ladder by the garage button and i panicked. i ran out bare foot, yelling her name and looking for her. i kept yelling her name but she was nowhere to be seen. i ran back inside the house and yelled her name while searching every bit of the house, just to make sure she wasn’t inside the house. and she wasn’t. my heart sank even more and as fear grew even more, i ran outside again and started running around the neighborhood. thoughts were running through my mind like what happened to her? where is she? did someone take her? oh God, please please help me find her. please please help that no one took her away, please. should i call 911? oh my, jay’s gonna be so mad, oh Heavenly Father, please, let me find my little girl, please, i begging you.
it was the scariest, most horrible 5 mins. of my entire life.
after running through one side of my house, i ran back to the house to go run to the other side of the house and then i saw our renters from the basement standing in our front yard. with adalie. adalie was holding a jar of gummy bear vitamins and apparently she wanted to share them with her friends in the basement so she went and knocked on their door and was with them the whole time. thank goodness. oh my, what a relief that was!!!
i was so happy to see her but then i remembered she went outside without my permission so i didn’t know how to react, whether to pick her up and run around screaming for joy or to scold her. so i just walked back with her, with my hand on her back, and told her how she cannot go outside without ever telling mommy or daddy and how scared i had been. right then, jay pulled up into the garage and he knew by my look on my face that something wasn’t right. when he got out of the car, i just held him tight and started crying. i told him what had happened and i thought he would be mad at me but the first thing he did was laugh and say, “so how fast were you running? i wish i saw you running barefoot around the neighborhood.”
we went inside the house and i just lied right then and there on the kitchen floor and didn’t move for at least 20 mins. i was in such shock and fear that when it was released, my body felt so weak. i lied there thinking how grateful i was that she was safe and that i found her but what could’ve happened to her. oh, i shudder at the thought.
so yes, i nominate myself as the worst mother of the year. it’s true. and it will never happen again.
