Just a week after giving birth, Jay and I went to Magleby’s for all you can eat crabs. Korean tradition is that you and the baby don’t go out for a month for the sake of you and the baby’s health and all these other extremities such as not bending or twisting your wrist(literally), not crunching on ice because all your teeth will fall out(my mother’s words exactly), etc. but that’s worth a whole other post. So my mom didn’t think it was a good idea but with my body feeling good and me wanting those dang crabs, we went nonetheless.
By the time we got our crabs I felt my breasts get engorged with milk due to skipping a feeding, but it was so good I kept eating my dang crabs. We wished Adalie was there with us and felt bad we left her behind and agreeing that she would love the crabs, we decided to ever so discreetly hide the crabs in a napkin and take it with us. Horrible idea. First of all, Jay had to go to the “bathroom” so on his way back he could snatch a napkin from another table. Second of all, Jay had to lean over next to my plate so he could break the crab legs and in the middle of doing so, our waitress appeared on our sight which caused Jay to jolt up out of nervousness and he dropped the crab legs and stopped everything he was doing which had to be SOOOOOOO obvious. We waited for the waiter to disappear out of sight and when he did, with the napkin Jay snatched on his way back from the bathroom, we rolled up a few legs and shoved it in my purse. Right after I shoved it in my purse I looked up and my eyes met with our waiter’s eyes who was by the cashier register in the corner. He had his eyes big with his mouth gaped open like he couldn’t believe what he was seeing and then he ducked down and started laughing with another waiter in the corner.
I never felt so embarrassed and shamed in my life! Then I realized I was just like my Asian mother whom just a few days earlier brought me a scone and a garlic bread wrapped ever so nicely in a napkin from Chuck-A-Rama. Why do Asians do this? Are we the only ones that do this? Whatever the case may be, that was the very day when I realized I am the stereo-typical Asian I make fun of sometimes. Ugh…
When I told Jay our waiter had totally seen us, the look on Jay’s face was priceless. You would’ve felt bad for the guy if you had seen it too. I could obviously tell he was all shame and embarrassed as well so we got up to leave ever so quickly and discreetly but it didn’t help that our waiter who was tending the table right next to us turned to us and said, “Oh take your time guys, there’s no rush.” ARE YOU KIDDING ME? OF COURSE THERE IS A RUSH, we just got caught stealing crab legs and shoving it in our purse!!! We gave him a 20% tip and half walked/half ran out of the restaurant and across the parking lot to get to our car to drive away as fast as we could. A lesson learned: There is ALWAYS somebody watching you.
