my father-in-law(which i call him just dad) was in town for work and stayed with us for a few days. it’s always a treat when he visits because not only does my husband and i love his company, our girls adore him and can never get enough of papa. it also means we get to go out to eat at his favorite places which we don’t mind at all either. 😉
my dress c/o of romwe.
aren’t you so glad the girl behind dad made it in the picture?
speaking of parents, i went to my parents’ house tonight to drop off some homemade pizza and chatted with them for a little bit(wasn’t that a smooth transition? huh? huh…? hello…?) and as i was leaving, my mom came out and stood outside to watch me while i put my shoes on, get in the car, drive away, and waved at me until i was out of sight. she does this everytime i come and go but tonight as i was waving back and driving away, i started getting teary eyed. it made me have flashbacks of my teenage years, walking home to meet my curphew and many times i saw from a far distance a little figure walking back and forth on our driveaway, anxiously waiting for me to come home safely. she would quietly stay up in her room if i was late and wait for me while awake until i came home and only then would she go to sleep in peace, knowing that her little daughter was home safe and sound.
i just felt such abundance of gratitude and love towards my parents who are such good parents, so loving, forgiving, supportive and wise. no matter how much i try to give back to them it’ll never be enough, but i will surely try my hardest to balance my side of the end.
then i thought about some things i’ve learned over the years. yeah, it sure was a deep drive. 🙂
1. my parents will always love me and it’s one of the greatest, most pure love i will receive on this earth. i loved my parents before i myself became a parent but now that i’m a mother, the love and the gratitude i have towards them is so much more deep and sincere. when i was pregnant and had morning sickness and felt like throwing up all day long i thought, ‘my mom went through this with me.’ when i was in labor and my body was shaking uncontrollably and tears voluntarily ran down my face from the intense pain i thought, ‘my mom felt this much pain to have me.’ when i woke up every 2-3 hours in the night to feed my little one and i was so tired and delirious i thought, ‘my mom did this for me.’ and those thoughts continue with me every difficult moment of motherhood, ‘my mom went through this to raise me.’
2. whatever i do, every decision i make, whether good or bad, affects them greatly. when i make a wrong choice, a bad choice, a horrible choice, it hurts them more than it hurts me and it breaks their hearts. i never linked it until i had children of my own but when i sin, it’s like a big slap in their face(and worse) because they sacrificed so much to raise me to be a good person, a kind person, and i’m not living up to their hopes and dreams they had of me since i was born.
3. when i’m angry towards someone, every second that passes by is a second wasted that i will never get back. life goes on and once my anger is gone and we make up, those wasted times will never be made up. if i’m mad at my husband for example, it affects him and the kids and the atmosphere of our home. and when i could have made happy memories for my husband, our girls’ childhood, and for my family as a whole, i have made a sad, empty memory instead. our girls will keep growing up, my husband and i will keep getting older and i will never have that moment of their childhood or our marriagehood again. (is that a word, marriagehood?) anyway so intead of being angry, sad or hurt, i need to realize that life goes on and that life is short, and it won’t wait for me. that i need to let my pride go and not waste any of my precious time and their precious time in being negative but to rejoice and live every moment happily and full of love.
4. i will always regret being unkind to someone. no matter who it is and what they did to me. but i will never ever regret forgiving someone, doing good to someone, speaking kind words to someone, complimenting someone, or saying thank you to someone.
life is beautiful if i let it be. and i intend to make it as beautiful as i can.
