Yes, there I said it. I said the word SEX, gasp! Being born in a conservative LDS home, I honestly can say I’ve never heard the word SEX uttered in my household, not even once. My parents never told me or taught me about sex and I learned from it from my friend in 5th grade. I remember being so shocked by it, I promised myself I would never have kids. But obviously 3 kids later, here I am!
While I think my parents are one of the greatest parents and they did their very best and I grew up in a very loving, supportive home, I do wish they taught me about sex and they were the first ones I heard it from. After finding out in 5th grade, I never talked about sex to anyone, not even with my friends, unless it was referred by somebody as a dirty joke. I must have skipped sex ed in Jr.High or something because I was absolutely clueless about sex. This is way too much information(but don’t we all love hearing those? Or is that just me? Okay…) but I didn’t even know the anatomy of a male body until I had sex for the first time, which was with my husband, meaning…. I didn’t know guys had testicles. Hahaha, I cannot believe I’m telling you guys this! That’s all I’ll say about that, just imagine my shock and horror thinking what the heck is that and wondering if he had some kind of a cancer or something. I also didn’t know what ejaculation was and that’s how you get pregnant.
So even before I had kids, I decided that I was going to be very open with my kids. And that sex would be learned from my husband and I and we would be the very source they would go to anytime they had questions about it. So I read many, many articles about it and when I attended Build Your Blog Conference in February, I overheard two ladies talking while standing in line to go to the bathroom and they were talking about sex and pornography and how to teach our kids about it and I had to chime in! The bathroom was like a master bedroom with an extra sitting room with sofas and such guys, don’t judge, okay? π One of the ladies was one of the contributors of these books 30 days of Sex Talks and also the President of Education and Empower Kids. As I talked to her more and more, I got more and more excited how everything I was implying with my kids and will do in the future aligned perfectly with hers! For example, here are some of the things I implement with my kids in teaching about sex.
1. I use the private words in their correct terms openly and casually with my kids, just as I do with other body parts. I tell them that you should use the terms correctly and only when you’re referring to the actual body part, and not in a demeaning manner but with respect because our bodies are sacred and beautiful and should be protected. I think if we use some other words for the private parts, it’s telling the kids that the real terms are shameful or bad or dirty and I want my kids to not be ashamed! And if I can’t refer to the private parts in their correct terms, why would they feel comfortable to talk about it or ask me questions about it as they grow up?
2. I believe “the sex talk” shouldn’t be a one-time, formal discussion, but more of a casual on-going conversation that is brought up often as needed and casually. I’ve heard of my friends tell me about their “sex talk” they had with their parents and every one of them have said it was awkward and they just tried to not pay attention and hoped it’d be over soon. I had my first “sex talk” with my 6 and 7 year old and taught them what the act of sex is. But I’ve always been very open about talking about their bodies and the differences between their bodies and the boys such as their little brother, so it was very casual and just a part of our conversation. We’ve had countless casual talks since then and they feel comfortable bringing it up in the middle of our conversation.
3. When my kids ask me questions about sex, no matter how silly it may sound, I don’t laugh at the question or make them feel embarrassed that they asked. I tell them, “Thank you for asking me, that is a good question!” And then I happily tell them the answer as a matter of fact. Then I tell them, “If you have any other questions at any other time, you can always ask me anything!”
4. I teach my kids that sex is a good, sacred, beautiful thing, not a dirty, shameful thing that must not be spoken of. I teach them that sex is such a good, beautiful, holy thing that we need to protect it and our bodies from the bad influences. The world makes it seem like sex is dirty and bad, but it’s just the opposite.
The book is amazing guys. I want to purchase the set of books for each of my siblings and all my friends with kids! It aligns with everything I believe in and I agree with everything I’ve read. Another things I love about the book is that it’s a very easy, simple, fast read! I am 1/2 way done with the book for ages 3-7 years after reading it for 15 mins. It’s written so that busy moms and dads can skim through it and be confident and ready to teach their kids. And since sex should be an on-going discussion, you can read a few chapters(each chapter is 1-2 pgs. long) and then discuss it with your kids, a few chapters at a time. It also talks about preventing/standing up for sexual abuse and pornography, self confidence and body confidence.
So I am excited to offer a full 3-set of books to 2 lucky readers! Each winner will get 3 books that covers ages 3-7, 8-11, and 12+, a value of $60. Just fill out the rafflecopter below, and good luck! Giveaway ends on May 9th. Open to U.S and Canada residents only.
Beverly Houpt says
This is the best! I agree with everything you mentioned. Thanks for the opportunity to win these cool books π
Krystal A. says
This is something every child needs to know. It makes me so sad to see how the world treats something so sacred. Thank you for the opportunity to win these books.
Natalie says
I was just looking into these books the other day because of a discussion I had with a friend! Glad to hear they are so good!
Rachel Booth says
My kids are 3 years old and a newborn! These books look great!
Sarah Lee Park says
Loved the candidness of this post!! π I can totally relate because I had a similar experience growing up (learned about sex from a friend during recess!) and very much agree that our kids should be hearing about it from us first, in the context of the beliefs and values we are teaching them. My kids are 1 and 3, and I'm so glad to hear about resources like these books to guide us through future discussions! Thank you for the giveaway! π
Ginnie says
What cool books! If I don't win this I definitely want to look into getting them! Thanks for sharing!!
Clarissa Sidhom says
Our kids aren't born yet, but this looks like an incredible resource and I'd love to have it in my arsenal! π
Catey Warner says
This is good. My parents never had the intention to make me feel silly or guilty when wondering about sex, but I did nonetheless. I'm worried I will be the same way with my kids no matter how prepared I am to talk to them about it. It is so important!
Jennifer Taylor says
This is great information! It is a subject that is important to teach our children. Thank you!
Sara Jolie says
I would also love to read these books with my kids! Thanks
Sara Jolie says
I would need to start with the 3-7 age ones
Anne says
My daughter will be 3 in June.
TheYellowRose says
This is everything I've been saying needs to happen! I'd love to have these books in my arsenal for when we have kids. π
Jennifer Senior says
My kids are 5,7 and 9.
Jennifer Senior says
I guess my other comment did not post. Thanks for having this open post on your blog and sharing this resource. These books would be awesome to have .
Lauren says
Interesting. My daughter is only 1 but I have no idea how to deal with this important issue and would love to see what the books have to say.
kiwi says
That's really interesting how different education system is in our country (Czech Republic). We learn about our body at school when we are about 8y old (including genitals) and there is no chance someone would know where are testicles or uterus because almost every year we have exams from biology and this is always part of it.
Hannah@Clementine Seeds says
My kids are 5, 3 and 1. I, like you, never had conversations with my parents about sex. I was left to learn about it through pornography, which caused serious guilt and image issues even as a married adult. i know it's a sacred, beautiful thing, but my "education" only taught me the dirty side. I want to speak openly with my kids about sex from a young age. Thanks for the giveaway!
Emily says
My oldest is 3 and I've been wondering when to start the sex talks. These books would help me out so much!
Li-Sha says
My friend once told me her sister-in-law calls their private parts by their real names and how she thought that was weird. I remember thinking "Okay but what else are you supposed to call them…" My friends kids only know they're called 'privates'! Isn't that insane!? HA! Anyway. Sex Ed is something I think is very important, starting at a young age. I love that you're doing this as a giveaway.
Li-Sha says
My kid is only a few months old right now, but I'm already wondering how to bring up this subject with her in a few years.
Tamara says
I love this post. I have been looking for a good set of books to help me through this process. What great timing!!!
Eugenia Xie says
These books would be perfect! Thanks for the giveaway! π
Cherisse says
I've been feeling very strongly that I, my husband and I, really need to start talking about sex with our three boys ages 4-8, especially our eight year old and just lay it all out to him, but of course with some good/helpful guidance because my parents never said a word to me either. I definitely do not want for my boys! I do not want them to learn about it from friends or in a worldly perspective. That isn't okay with me. So I really appreciate your post and sharing this awesome info on these books!