I was just telling my husband last night how discouraging it is that from the moment I wake up until he gets home from work, I am up on my feet and constantly moving, constantly busy and doing things for our children and yet when he comes home, the house is often times messy and I don’t have dinner ready on the table, and it doesn’t look like I did much that day. That all the work I do can’t be measured or proven, there’s no charts or certificates to measure my accomplishments. Before I had my 3rd child, the house was almost always clean and a hot dinner was ready on the table when he walked in the door. Now with 3 children, especially with a very clingy infant, that just doesn’t happen anymore! I know I should just accept it but I am having a hard time. I feel guilty that the house isn’t spotless clean. I feel guilty that the girls don’t get as much attention and time or one on one time. I feel guilty that there’s always laundry to be washed, or laundry in the washer that I forgot to transfer to the dryer, or clean clothes that needs to be folded and put away. I know I should relax and just accept the fact that I can’t do it all anymore with 3 kids, but I still try and feel guilty for failing every time because it really is impossible.
So I told him that even though the house is a mess and the dinner isn’t made a lot of the times when he gets home, I promise I was busy! I promise I was up and about doing productive things all day! But he doesn’t see all the things I do, and comes home to a messy home and I wonder if he thinks, “What did she do all day?” Then today my husband mentioned this video and told me it reminded him of me. That even though I might get discouraged because no one truly sees all the things I do in the house, he knows I do a ton of work and he appreciates everything I do. That he is so grateful to have a mother like me for his children. It feels so good to have recognition as a mother because we don’t get much from the world. I love my sweet husband and I love this video for making mothers feel pretty awesome! And if you are a dad, this applies to you too! My husband is just as dedicated and involved in the parenting, I just happen to stay at home with them while he goes to work. But that’s not to say he doesn’t work very hard at work and at home. So I wanted to share it with you and in case you are feeling guilty or not good enough as a parent, you are truly amazing. Working parents and stay-at-home parents, we are the same. We are all parents doing the best we can in trying to raise good citizens. I promise you that God recognizes every thing you do for your family. Every deed we do for our home will not go unrecognized in Heaven.
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Linh Vo says
🙂 This made me smile. I only have one kid and I have let go of my OCD tendencies. The house is usually fairly clean, but dinner is rarely ready when he gets home and there are always dishes in the sink and I do feel guilty at times. But, I think that I've spent ALL day with baby do the typical stuff (eating, changing, bathing, etc), but also playing with her and teaching her and it's exhausting….and at the end of the day, if baby is healthy and happy, that's all that matters. I saw this video and it was awesome. You are doing an amazing job friend! And I know your hubby thinks so too 🙂
Linh
http://abeautifulrawr.com
Angela J. Kim says
I have two "older kids" and still can't manage it all. I struggled a lot with this the first few years of motherhood (ok, maybe more like 4-5 yrs) but have learned to let go slowly. I do find myself explaining to others (maybe to myself) that the mundane chores ARE important and that I AM making a huge difference in the world by being a SAHM. It's tough and definitely a spiritual and emotional journey but know you're definitely not alone in this. As a mom who gave up a blossoming career to be home with her two kids, I can totally relate. If you managed a clean house and hot dinner with two kids, you're amazing momma!
Sara Jolie says
tears!!! such a great video that puts it all into perspective