pictures of me and my girls at the petting zoo at thanksgiving point.
oh, the chicks are so cute, they melt my heart!
miss A. did a wonderful job taking the picture. she even included her lil’ finger in it. π
so i haven’t had a breakdown for a long time. and i don’t think it’s because i’ve had a lot of alone time or anything like that. i’m not saying i don’t get overwhelmed or frustrated, i get plenty of that, but it goes away after a small moment and i think it’s all because of my change of perspective on motherhood. would you like to hear it? okay, okay, since you asked! π
one particular day when i was unpacking from a trip from california, doing loads of laundry(which isn’t as simple as it sounds- sorting, washing, drying, folding, putting away-it takes a LONG time!), cleaning the bathroom that’s been left uncleaned for two weeks, cleaning the kitchen and doing the dishes, and many other chores i thought to myself, ‘im so sick and tired of doing these chores, only to do it again tomorrow and every single day after that for the rest of my life! i didn’t know i was signing up to be a slave, a maid, a cook, a nanny,!’ then a thought occured to me. i think it was God reprimanding me for being my whiny self. the thoughts were that these aren’t chores. nothing but endless, mundane chores that i thought it was, they are not. they are sacred, and very important. these chores make a home, clothe and feed my loving husband and my wonderful kids, makes them clean, keeps them sanitized, healthy, and brings the spirit into the home. God cannot dwell in unclean places and having a clean, loving home invites the spirit into our home. these chores are vital and an important part of motherhood.
and another thought came to me that while the world will never acknowledge how strong and intelligent you have to be to be a good mother, God acknowledges it. and that’s all that matters. one gets a diploma when you graduate from high school, go to college and get a bachelor’s degree, masters, a Ph.D, but mothers do not receive any diplomas from the world’s perspective, but in the end, we will get a diploma when we go to heaven. a Ph.D takes 6+ or so years but motherhood takes a lifetime. i’m not trying to degrade education or careers, i myself plan on going back to school and getting a career when my kids are in school and i think it’s wonderful, i’m just saying while the world values and respects education/career more than motherhood, God does not. and i think everyone has a different timeline in their lives and for some, it’s to get their education and work on their careers before/during/after they get married/not married or have children/not have children, and if that’s God’s will for them, they will be just as blessed and respected in God’s eyes. everyone is doing the best that they can in their circumstance and i respect every person’s decision, no matter how different their choices are from mine.
so even though yes, these chores will seem like it’ll never end, and it’s not fun doing the same things over and over again only to start all over the next day, one day it will end. my girls will grow up and leave for college(oh, that breaks my heart thinking about it!), and i will miss the day when they drew all over the mirror with my lipstick, drew all over the wall with my nail polish, or peed on the couch because they were too lazy to walk to the bathroom. (all true story bytheway. π
so when i walk into a room full of big mess, or see the kitchen with dirty dishes overflowing in the sink, or find my kids drawing/spilling everywhere, i quickly remember that this is all an important part of motherhood. and not only is it feeding/clothing/raising my children, it’s also teaching me about patience, service, selflessness, and love. and those things are the most important “diplomas” i will ever earn than any other diplomas i may get in the future.
Jodi Ann says
YES!!! A million times yes! I read through this and it made me so happy. I struggle often with those same thoughts about chores and doing this for the rest of my life and even though there are good days, on some days I just need the reminder that this is important, that God values this motherhood life. Thank you for posting! π
Sarah says
You are an ANGEL! This post is beautiful. I needed to hear every word of it! I will never look at my chores the same way… you are so right – it's all for the health and the happiness of the family. Thank you so, so much for sharing. π
Emily says
Thank you so much for this post. I feel the same way a lot and I only have one child. I'm pregnant with our second and I know I'm going to get much more overwhelmed more often! I love what truths you spoke. Can I link this up on my blog?
steph nelsen says
: )
euphoricgirl says
such a very nice reflection and just what every mom should read and know about especially after a very tiring week of never ending house chores, etc!
rainydazeee
kanaboke says
I soooo needed this post! Thank you for putting such a beautiful spin on the everyday life of Wife/Mother/Sister/WomanHood!
Jamie Nicole says
I WISH a PhD took 6 years.
Why is Jay not helping more with the day to day stuff?
Sarah says
@Jamie: I am sorry if I offended you in any way. I respect education and my goal is to get a PhD one day myself. I just wanted to emphasize that while the world gives respect and credit to people with education, the world doesn't give the respect and credit mothers deserve. That was the point I wanted to make and it makes me feel bad if I offended you in any way.
and Jay does help me a ton, more than he should i think sometimes haha. He was renovating my parents' house the whole time I was in california with my mom and wanted to surprise her and was in a time crunch so he didn't have the time to tidy up our house. π
thanks for your comments, ladies, it makes me happy that it's helped you in a small way! π
<3
Sara Lou says
Hello there, I LOVE your blog posts and happened upon your stuff through Pinterest. This is such a great post and it made me think of this Ensign article that I came across before we had our first child. I knew it was something to remember because I had heard many times that mothers can get in ruts sometimes. It's just a short article but I thought I would send you the link to read it as well. She makes a great point that can help for future "ruts". Thanks for your fun inspiring blog!
Was I Living the Gospel Fully?
By Carolynn R. Spencer
(you'll have to scroll down a few short articles to find this one)
http://lds.org/ensign/2009/07/latter-day-saint-voices/was-i-living-the-gospel-fully?lang=eng&query=Living+Gospel+Fully%3f+Carolynn+R.+Spencer
Lisa L says
What a good thing to read at the beginning of the week. It gives me the perspective and courage to get going today. Thanks for being real, Sarah!
Leah says
Thank you so much for this post, Sarah. I needed to hear it so much. I complain all the time about being my family's slave and think so often that it's a waste of *MY* talents/resources. What a load of self-centered cr@p. I'm ashamed! "The first shall be last, and the last shall be first." Thank you for helping me to remember that the world's standards are not God's standards and He cares about so much more about our hearts, not worldly accomplishments.
Jamie Nicole says
You didn't offend me at all. It's just that a PhD. takes a minimum of about 8 years. ;P
Stacey says
Hi! I found your blog last night through a picture of a cute shirt on Pinterest. I started from today march 30, 2012 and am here oct 2011. You have such a great blog! It is so thoughtful and your family is adorable. I like it because you are so real. I saw your post on how you there weren't as many comments at one point and I thought I should comment.
I love the tutorials, I started sewing last year. I made my daughter a skirt! And a pillow case with french seams. I need to learn more! Your ideas are making me want to pull out that old sewing machine! I was trying to figure out how to follow you on interest, on my tabletthings can be wonky.
A couple months ago, I actually saw the post on Mindy Gledhills sight, when you remade the dress for her, I got to that sight from nienie, its such a fun blog world. I am off to try to get my family all together and awake to watch General Conf!! I end up watching by myself….one by one they wander off….have a great day.
Oh yeah, the post above hit home, all I want to do is read a good book and scrapbook, or hike and sew or paint and go for a walk, but I need to go do dishes, make sure my hubby has clean underwear and clean urine off the toilet…..someday!
Sarah says
Hi Sara, Sorry this is such a late response but I thought I had replied back along time ago. i read that article as soon as I saw your comment and it was wonderful! I'm off to read it again, thank you so much for sharing!
Sarah says
Leah, thank you so much for your comment! And no, it's not a self centered cr@p(i love how you used the symbol instead, you are so cute!), it's our natural human nature and every mother feels that way sometimes. But you seem like a wonderful mother just by your words. π
Sarah says
Oh wow, thank you so much for reading so much of my posts, I'm so flattered and honored! And I love getting comments so I appreciate it. π And yes, everytime I feel smothered, I try to remember that one day they would rather hand out with their friends all day and I would look back on this time right now and wish they would bug me and smother me once again. π
Kiki Alexander says
Four years after your post, you have inspired me to do my laundry Laundry! Thank you!